Kona Tama High
by Blizzaris
Summary: AU Join your favourite characters from Naruto to Inuyasha to Kingdom Hearts as they wind up in the silliest of shenanigans! --DISCONTINUED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE--
1. Chapter 1

**Kona Tama High **

**_An Inuyasha – Naruto Crossover _**

**Chapter 1 **

**The first day of grade 10 **

_My second fic ppls, so PLEASE review! Also my first comedic attempt -smiles-_

THUD!

The 15-year old boy fell out of his bed and hit the floor with a loud noise, shaking the floor. He thrashed and twisted in his tangled comforter, trying to get free to turn off his rather annoyingly beeping alarm clock. Finally throwing it aside, he stood up, revealing chiselled abs, and red boxers. His long, silver hair fell to his waist as he punched his alarm clock, amber eyes squinting against the harsh glare of his light. Muttering something about 'effing alarm', he looked at the time on the now broken display. His eyes widened and he started stomping around his room, frantically pulling on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, yelling 'SHIT I'M GONNA BE LATE! WHY DIDN'T ANYONE WAKE ME UP?' he glared at his older brother, Sesshomaru, who was calmly admiring his reflection in his full-length mirror as he dashed past. The older boy ignored him, adjusting his Abercrombie & Fitch jacket.

After 10 minutes of running around his house and getting ready for school, he grabbed his bag and raced out the door, his Nike shoes still undone. About a block from his average house, he caught up with a shorter, raven-haired boy walking with his hands in his pockets. He was wearing a black tee, loose shorts and és shoes; his black hair sticking out at the back. The boy glanced at him out of the side of his slanted eyes in acknowledgment. Before either could say a word, they were joined by another dark- and messy-haired guy wearing American Eagle shirt and jeans.

"Hey guys. How was your summer?" the last boy inquired as he fell in step with the other two. The first boy simply replied 'Fine' and left it at that. The questioner turned to the taller boy who didn't reply.

"Inuyasha?" he prompted.

"Keh. The usual. Parents left for vacation, so it was me and Sesshomaru the whole time." The other boy looked as if he was about to say something, but before he could say a word, they heard footsteps behind them and a hand gave the American Eagle-clad boy a resounding slap that echoed around the neighbourhood.

"Miroku!" shouted the owner of the hand that slapped him. She was a fiery-looking, long-haired brunette wearing a tight red tank top saying 'my face is not down here' across her chest and a black skirt. She started yammering away to Miroku very fast; it seemed he was the only one who could keep up. Inuyasha just stared, not bothering to help his friend. A dark haired girl wearing a green shirt and jeans appeared beside the tallest boy, completely ignoring the yelling beside her.

"Sango seems to be in a testy mood this morning," she commented dryly.

"I think testy is an understatement…" Inuyasha replied, sweat dropping.

"Good morning, Sasuke!" a pink-haired girl greeted the quiet boy brightly. He murmured a greeting as she fell in step beside him.

"Okay, Sango, I think Miroku has had quite enough for this morning," A blond girl said gently, prising Miroku's throat from beneath her friend's fingers. She had clear blue eyes and a purple dress and heeled sandals to match.

"Ino, don't you think that dress is a little short for dress code?" The pink-haired, green-eyed girl with Sasuke commented, raising an eyebrow at her dress which barely reached mid-thigh.

"What do you mean? I don't see anything wrong with it…" Miroku argued, leaning back to get a good view of Ino's ass. Sango slapped him, if possible, harder than the first time, sending the boy reeling. The blond just sniffed as the girl beside Inuyasha stifled a giggle.

"It's not my fault if I've grown over the summer," Ino stated haughtily.

"I don't think that's the reason it's so short," the giggling girl snorted. The blond just glared at her. Deciding to change the topic, as Sango was threatening to slap him again if he said anything else, Miroku posed the same question to the girls that he had asked Sasuke and Inuyasha.

"Oh same old, same old, movies, mall, you know," Ino flapped her hand in the air dismissively. "How was your trip to Japan , Kagome?"

The girl with Inuyasha replied, "Oh, it was good. We went to this one shrine and it was apparently the place where that girl got pulled through a well into another era and meets that dog boy. You know, that old myth?" The others nodded.

They turned a corner, and their school came into sight. It was a large, four-story building, with the name Kona Tama Collegiate Institute in bold letters across the front of the school. Students were all entering through the many sets of doors at the top of a wide set of stairs. The seven teens followed everyone else, moving towards the tables in the foyer, where teachers were handing out their timetables for the year. After receiving theirs, they all reconvened in the main hallway where they claimed their lockers and discussed their classes.

"DAMMIT, WHAT THE HELL!" Inuyasha cried, outraged. Sakura looked over his shoulder on tiptoe to see his paper.

"Ooh, Gai, eh? Me too," She sympathized.

"I've got him too," Miroku grimaced.

"I've got Kaede," Sasuke said. Ino screamed.

"ME TOO! We get a whole hour and a half together EVERY DAY!" Sakura scowled at Ino, the speaker. The blond stuck out her tongue and beamed in triumph. Sasuke looked as if he would rather jump into a volcano.

"Well, that puts me and you in Kakashi's class…" Kagome said to Sango, who winced. Puzzled, Kagome inquired "What's so bad about him?"

"You'll see," Sango shuddered. The bell rang, telling the friends to split up and go to their classes. Inuyasha, Sakura and Miroku headed up to the third floor for math.

"Shit, man! Why do we have to have _math_ first? I HATE math!" Inuyasha pouted, while several girls swooned.

"Probably because you always fail it?" Miroku suggested distractedly; he had caught the attention of another group of girls down the hall and did not plan on wasting the opportunity.

"Well that's against the point…" Inuyasha muttered. They walked into the classroom, freezing in their tracks halfway through the doorway.

"Hell. No," Inuyasha said, eyes wide in horror. The other two just stared. Before them, in all his …er… glory, stood Gai. He wore a skin-tight green spandex suit, tight enough to show the whole package, if you know what I mean. He also wore a headband around his mushroom cut of glossy black hair. Noticing them, he gave a warm greeting.

"Students! In the prime of their youth! May your youthfulness not stop you from taking a seat, my dear pupils!" At this point he made a move towards them to usher them into the room, but they all scrambled away from his outstretched arms, Miroku looking the most terrified, shouting 'IT'S HIDEOUS! DON'T LET IT TOUCH YOU!' and sprinting to the farthest seat from him. However, Gai, not seeming to notice this, just laughed in a jolly way and explained,

"I was just out jogging 500 laps around the school with Lee!" Here he looked at the only non-terrified person in the classroom, who looked exactly like… GAI! Miroku, who was the height of male fashion, was now rocking back and forth rather emo-ishly in the corner, Sakura and Inuyasha beside him, staring at the terrible sight. The boy in the front row who was apparently Lee was leaning forward eagerly, hanging on to every word uttered by his idol.

"GAI-SENSEI!'

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!'

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!'

"LEE!" they sprinted towards each other in slow motion in front of a sunset, before Inuyasha ruined the moment by wiggling a finger in his ear and saying "Do I hear an echo in here?" At this, Gai noticed that the whole class was settled, although everyone except Lee was sitting in the back half of the room, looking traumatized. Some of the girls were looking, er, below the belt and cringed, looked away and blushed, crying 'My eyes! My innocence! My _God_!'

Needless to say, it was a painful period.

_Well, whaddya think? What's that? You don't know how? See that little purple button down there? Yeah, that one. Press it and send me a review! Now you have no excuse to not review cuz I've just shown you how._


	2. Lunch time at Kona Tama High

**Chapter 2**

**Lunch time at Kona Tama High**

YAY chappy two! Please enjoy and REVIEW! Wow, that even rhymed :P

When the bell rang for lunch, all seven friends burst out of their classrooms gasping for breath. Meeting at their lockers, no one tried to make conversation; it was too loud in the halls to be heard clearly anyways. There were mixed emotions; Ino looked happy, Miroku traumatized, and Sasuke actually pulled out his thickest textbook and hit himself repeatedly on the head. Luckily, Sakura stopped him before he did any serious damage, but the girls in the hall all looked obsessively concerned and started mobbing Sasuke, trying to see if there was a bump or a bruise or anything. The usually stoic Sasuke looked slightly frightened, as he was being swept down the hall and couldn't escape. However, Miroku had a plan.

The handsome boy stood in a doorway, the top few buttons of his shirt undone, looking seductive. The fangirls noticed and, drooling, all rushed over to Miroku instead, who took them in his stride ('Ladies, ladies, please, there's enough of me to go around…'). Sasuke was left forgotten on the floor, dazed. Ino, Sakura and Kagome rushed over to him, but it seemed he was unharmed. Sango, however, looked ready to explode, so they just left her in the hallway to cool down. Upon getting to the cafeteria and sitting down, the girls started discussing their new teachers vehemently. When Ino started talking, Sasuke looked like he had swallowed a tomato whole, then grabbed Inuyasha's Mars bar and ripped open the wrapper, taking a huge bite. Inuyasha protested indignantly, but Kagome gasped.

"Sasuke! What are you doing! You-"

"I know, but I can't stand another history class like that ever again," he explained grimly, determinedly finishing the chocolate bar. The words were barely out of his mouth when his skin began erupting in hives. At that same moment, a scared-looking Miroku burst into the cafeteria, pursued by a murderous Sango.

"Wait! Sango! I was only doing it to help Sasuke!"

"OMG SASUKE YOUR FACE!" Ino screamed.

"WELL YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO LOOK LIKE YOU WERE ENJOYING IT SO MUCH!" Sango yelled at him, still trying to catch him as he ran between the tables.

"HIS BEAUTIFUL FACE! WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO? I CAN'T HAVE HIM LOOKING LIKE THAT FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE!"

"Please, Sango, understand it was all to help our friend!"

"WHAT ABOUT THE WEDDING?"

"AND WOULD THAT FRIEND HAPPEN TO BE ANYWHERE NEAR YOUR CROTCH AREA?"

"SHUT UP INO!" screamed Kagome and Sakura to the blond girl who was running around like a chicken with its head cut off. However, as soon as I describe this, A CHICKEN RUNS INTO THE SCENE!

"WHAT THE HELL IS WITH THE CHICKEN!" Everyone shouted at once.

"Sorry!" hollered Malon as she ran after the chicken, trying to catch it. Miroku immediately tried to help her.

"May I offer my assistance, madam-"

SMACK!

"NO YOU MOST CERTAINLY MAY NOT!" bellowed Sango as she punched the teen out cold, having finally caught up with him. The cafeteria was silent. The four girls looked around. All the other students were staring with their eyes open, jaws agape. Well, except for Inuyasha who was still eating his lunch as if nothing had happened. Having finished his food, the silver-haired boy muttered 'stupid idiot… I wanted that chocolate bar…' Hearing this, all four looked back at Sasuke, who was lying on the floor, still covered in hives, but forgotten. He wasn't moving. They stared… wait for it…

"AHHHH SASUKE!" screamed Ino again as they all dashed to his body, trying to lift it.

"Inuyasha, help!"

"Why? You seem to be doing fine."

"You're stronger than us!"

"Damn straight." The four girls looked at him expectantly. He paid them no attention, as he had started looking through their lunches and if there was anything worth taking. Veins popped in the girl's foreheads.

"JUST HELP US CARRY HIM!" they yelled at him. The boy swung his head from the food, to his unconscious friend and back again several times. After a long time, he answered them.

"Make Miroku do it." That was the last straw. The girls gave a Herculean effort and lifted Sasuke's body over their heads and threw him at the unsuspecting Inuyasha, (who was now eating Sango's potato chips) who skidded across the table and hit a pole on the other side. Several onlookers winced. Inuyasha was now sporting a record breaking lump on the side of his head, but one look at the four girls and he hastily picked up Sasuke and followed them out the door.

"And don't touch my chips," Sango growled menacingly.


	3. Hospital Woes Part 1

**Chapter 3**

**Hospital Woes Part 1: Of Shit-o, Shinigamis and Pointed Sticks**

_On to the next chappy, then! REVIEWERS WILL BE LOVED IN A STRICTLY NON-SEXUAL AND/ OR PERVERTED WAY_

* * *

They ended up having to take Sasuke to the hospital, as the school nurse was sick. 

"What the hell is with this school?" Inuyasha angrily ranted. "First they let a teacher teach in _spandex_, they let a _student_ wear spandex, they made_ me_ be in that class, and now the friggin nurse is SICK!"

"Yes, a little ironic, isn't it…" Kagome agreed dazedly. She was off day-dreaming of sugar plums again… and it isn't even Christmas…

They were sitting in the hospital room given to Sasuke as he recovered from his allergic relation to the stolen Mars bar. His face had swollen up some more so now he faintly resembled a puffer fish with his lips sticking out. It was actually quite amusing. They stayed at the hospital just long enough to skip the rest of school, (the lazy slackers… but who wouldn't want to avoid as much time as possible with Gai? Ew, spandex…) then left and said they'd visit every day because they're good like that.

After a few days, Sasuke was looking back to normal again, much to Ino's extreme and Sakura's more modest pleasures. He even told them the reason he ate the chocolate was to escape his horrible history homeroom class. However, nothing was to prepare these mere high school students for what was to come.

Discovering he was to be released the next day, Sasuke settled down for a nice sleep Saturday evening. He soon drifted off and was dreaming of many pleasant things, prominent among these was a certain someone dressed up in a-

Something knocked his bed, jerking him awake before I could describe for you who was in his dream. Maybe that was planned, but we shall never know… anyways, he was now wide awake; listening hard to find out what had awakened him during such a pleasant dream. It was a very little known fact that Uchiha Sasuke is greatly afraid of the paranormal, so as he lie there, his heart began to race. The room was fairly dark, and he thought he could see something moving near the foot of his bed…

He had broken out into a cold sweat as the lump started to move. It came closer, and closer, until –

"BOO!"

"AIIIIEEEEEEEE!" Sasuke screamed at a high and girly pitch that Ino would have admired, then rocketed out of his bed, to the right and through the halls of the hospital, his screech bouncing off the walls. The boy who scared Sasuke just had a blank look on his face, wondering how saying 'boo!' was so scary. Figuring that he'd ask him when he caught up, he set off down the halls skipping gaily and humming a little tune.

Sasuke was panicking. It was worse than a ghost or a zombie or even… GAI AND KAKASHI DANCING IN REALLY TIGHT TUTUS AND SPANDEX! **(A/N: Whoa, how does he know what _that_ looks like!)** It was far worse… worse than he had ever feared… it was… that really annoying kid in his history class named SHIT-O! Or Shippo… close enough. He was a third of the reason he had eaten that God-forsaken piece of chocolate in the first place! It was terrible, he had to hide; to get away! Turning left, he dashed down another dark corridor and was lost to sight.

Kagome, Inuyasha, Sango, Sakura, Ino and Miroku all came to visit their buddy that very same evening, but when they got to the room, they were shocked, shocked! To see that Sasuke wasn't there!

"Jinkies!" Kagome exclaimed, a pushing up a pair of thick glasses on her nose which seemingly materialized out of nowhere.

"It looks like Sasuke's gone! Let's split up and look for him, gang!" Miroku said, wearing a striped sweater.

"Where did you get that?" Ino asked, looking at his new sweater in confusion and disgust. It was sooo 70's.

"The author told me to put it on," Miroku shrugged. "Okay, Ino and Kagome come with me; you three can all search together so we're even."

"Shouldn't it be three and two?" Inquired Ino.

"Speak for yourself, we need all the help we can get since we've got ol' numbnuts over here…" Sango replied sourly, indicating Inuyasha.

"Huh?" They sweat dropped; he clearly hadn't been listening. Then they all turned expectantly to the silver-haired boy. Noticing their gazes after a while, he took a step back.

"Don't you _DARE_ make any Scooby Snack jokes!" he threatened. The other five sighed.

"Okay, so which direction do we start off in?" Suddenly, Kenpachi ran into the scene, stopping at the doorway to the hospital room and consulted the young and cheerful pink-haired girl riding on his back.

"Umm… we go this way!" The eye-patched Shinigami warily asked her if it was right. "Yup! I'm sure of it!" Looking sceptical, but deciding to trust her decision, he turned to the people staring at him. "Are you coming or not?" No one answered for a few moments, but eventually Sakura piped up.

"Uh, aren't you supposed to be in Soul Society?"

"The author put me here…"

"Demanding little bugger, isn't she?" Miroku murmured. Something rather like a pointed stick poked him in the pack of the head sharply. "Ow!" The stick came down again and smacked him upside the head before vanishing.

"Say something like that again and I'll kill you off!" a savage growl boomed around the room, shutting Miroku up smartly. **(A/N: I love my job :D)**

"So… I guess we should head off, then?" Sango suggested uncertainly, making sure no pointed sticks were headed in her direction. With several hurried agreements, the Miroku, Ino and Kagome set off after Kenpachi and Yachiru to the left, while the other half went to the right.

_

* * *

_

_SHVEET! I just figured out the line feature thing... now i can SEPERATE stuff:D Yup, split this chapter up… sorry guys! Stay tuned for the next EXCITING part of the hospital adventure! And I want you to know it makes me very sad that I get so many hits and so little reviews… It makes me cry!_

_**blizzy**_


End file.
